Being single on Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to be a drag. It could even be—dare I say—celebrated? This February 14th, don’t even think about feeling sorry for yourself and, instead, embrace this special stage in your life where you get to focus entirely on you. Yes, that means eating all the chocolate you want, penning love letters to yourself, and surprising yourself with a beautiful bouquet of flowers!
But if you’re still having trouble shaking the implications of this holiday, then it’s time to turn to our Valentine’s Day Survival Guide. Follow our tips and then check out our list of the 50 best quotes for Valentine’s Day singles for inspiration.
Funny Valentine’s Day Quotes
Regardless of whether you’re in a relationship or not, Valentine’s Day can get a little out of hand at times. Rather than letting it get to your head, try to remember, it’s a made-up holiday and just an ordinary day like any other! So, if you need a chuckle today, take a look at these funny Valentine’s Day quotes.
“Today is Valentine’s Day. Or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day.” — Jay Leno
“Valentine’s Day is oftentimes a, well, it’s a manufactured day that doesn’t really mean anything.” — Jon Stewart
“Today may be Single’s Awareness Day, but chin up. Tomorrow is half-price candy day!” — Unknown
“Valentine’s Day money-saving tip: Break up on February 13th, get back together on the 15th.” — David Letterman
“Next February I’m going to file a lawsuit against Valentine’s Day for singles’ discrimination.” — Unknown
“If you’re alone during Valentine’s Day, it is priceless for you. Otherwise, you would spend a few hundred [dollars].” — Unknown
“I had every intent of celebrating Valentine’s Day, but when Cupid got around to me, it seems he had run out of arrows.” — Unknown
“I don’t understand why Cupid was chosen to represent Valentine’s Day. When I think about romance, the last thing on my mind is a short, chubby toddler coming at me with a weapon.” — Unknown
“If being in love is what it means to be free, then this Valentine’s Day, my heart is in solitary confinement!” — Unknown
“Valentine’s Day is a time to celebrate the joy of being in love. Unless you’re single and lonely—then it’s called Laundry Day.” — Dane Cook
“I like to look at myself more as a free agent than as a lonely single on Valentine’s Day.” — Unknown
“Oh here’s an idea: Let’s make pictures of our internal organs and give them to other people we love on Valentine’s Day. That’s not weird at all.” — Jimmy Fallon
“What do single people call Valentine’s Day? Independence Day!” — Unknown
“Being single means I didn’t have to guilt anyone into taking me to dinner to celebrate a fake holiday tonight.” — Unknown
“Today might be S.A.D. (Singles Awareness Day), but tomorrow is discount chocolate day.” — Unknown
“Just saved tons of money on Valentine’s Day by switching to single.” — Unknown
“Valentine’s Day is for couples. Us singles have the other 364 days of the year to enjoy ourselves!” — Unknown
Funny Quotes About Being Single as a Man or Woman
Some like to call Valentine’s Day “Single Awareness Day,” so why not run with that concept? Celebrate your singlehood today and have a laugh as you read these funny single Valentine’s Day quotes!
“Current relationship status: Made dinner for two. Ate both.” — Unknown
“The best thing about being a single woman is sleeping around. You can sleep all over that bed of yours. Left. Right. Middle.” — Unknown
“When someone asks me why I’m still single…I guess I’m overqualified!” — Unknown
“Being single sucks. The only thing I get to do anymore is whatever the hell I want.” — Unknown
“Being single is pretty good. It’s a nice sense of irresponsibility.” — Michael Douglas
“Roses are red. Violets are blue. Vodka is cheaper than dinner for two.” — Unknown
Uplighting and Empowering Single Valentine’s Day Quotes
Your relationship status doesn’t define you on Valentine’s Day or any other day of the year. But if you’re feeling down come this February 14th, check out these uplifting and empowering quotes for Valentine’s Day singles to remind you of your worth—with or without a partner.
“Being single used to mean that nobody wanted you. Now it means you’re pretty sexy, and you’re taking your time deciding how you want your life to be and who you want to spend it with.” — Sex and the City
“I celebrate myself, and sing myself.” — (Walt Whitman)
“I am happy, because I’m single by choice, not by chance.” — Unknown
“No, I’m not giving up on love yet. After all, I’m not going to stop eating just because I can’t cook.” — Unknown
“Yes, I’m alone, but I’m alone and free.” — Frozen
“The single woman is a free woman, and being single does not mean being alone – it means being free to have a relationship or not. This can be scary, but it’s also very interesting.” — Monica Bellucci
“I’m single not because I don’t pray for love. I’m single because I don’t play with love.” — Unknown
“Happily single is recognizing that you don’t need or want to be rescued from your life by a handsome prince because your life is pretty awesome as it is.” — Mandy Hale
“If you really are going to be a happy single, you have to stop treating being single as the annoying time that you pass between relationships and embrace it. Rather than focusing on what you lack, focus on what you have: You.” — Natalie Lue
“Being single is about celebrating and appreciating your own space that you’re in.” — Kelly Rowland
“I’m not alone! I’m with myself. And myself is fabulous.” — Eva Longoria
“Don’t be sad if you are single on Valentine’s Day. Work hard, achieve something and see, one day, the right person will cross your path.” — Harshal “Harry” Batha
“Single and fabulous, exclamation point.” — Carrie Bradshaw, Sex and the City
“Comfortable in my skin. Cozy with who I am.” — Beyoncé
“How you love yourself is how you teach others to love you.” — Rupi Kaur
“You don’t need a significant other to lead a significant life.” ― Mandy Hale
“Being single is getting over the illusion that there is somebody out there to complete you and taking charge of your own life.” — Omkar Phatakc
“Single |sin•gle| (adjective): Too fabulous to settle.” — Mandy Hale
“My mom said to me, ‘You know sweetheart, one day you should settle down and marry a rich man.’ And I said, ‘Mom, I am a rich man.’” — Cher
“We have become the men we wanted to marry.” — Gloria Steinem
Third-Wheel Funny Single Valentine’s Day Quotes
Sometimes, third-wheeling comes with the singleton territory. If you’ve been feeling like the third-wheel on or around Valentine’s Day, enjoy these funny and inspiring quotes that speak to your situation.
“Two’s company; three’s a party.” — Unknown
“Great couples need a third wheel to keep the balance.” — Unknown
“The third wheel: The honorary member of the couple’s club.” — Unknown
“Being the third wheel is not always a bad thing. It means you have the opportunity to observe and learn from the dynamics of other relationships.” — Unknown]
“Who needs couple goals when you have third-wheel goals?” — Unknown
“Third wheeling is not a burden but a blessing.” — Unknown
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